Last night I went to listen to JJ Heller in concert. It was amazing. I loved all her songs and her voice is awesome. She and her husband have written some inspiring, insightful,powerful, uplifting, truthful songs. Some songs tugged at my heart.
They announce that they are going to do a drawing for a couple of prizes and to go register. So I go put my name in the box. The prizes were a stack of CDs and an autographed harmonica (which they said could be worth money later on as JJ's singing career continues to take off). I get excited and whisper to my husband that it would be great to win the stack of CDs. I love music and the thought of winning all that music would be totally awesome.
It's been a while and now they have decided to do the drawing. The first guy says lets do the drawing for the harmonica but then the other one says no lets draw for the CDs. So when they didn't call my name I was a little disappointed. So next was the drawing for the harmonica. The guy holding the box stumbled or something because he dropped the box and some of the papers fell out of the box. I guess a little more mixing up was needed :)
As soon as the guy picked the paper up and I saw it just there in his hand before he opened it to read the name on the paper I had this feeling.....I just knew. (It was strange but exciting at the same time) He starts off saying "Katrina" and then has trouble saying my last name but I stood up and pronounced my name as I began walking up to the stage to receive my prize...the autographed harmonica. I was in shock at first since I'd never won anything before. I never had much luck in drawings or door prizes, things like that.
I sit back down and my husband was beaming with a huge smile. He had been thinking how cool it would be to have the harmonica. It really didn't matter at the moment what I had won I was just excited about winning something.
After the concert on the way home in the car we all talked about the concert and how we each enjoyed it. I mentioned how I just knew that was my name on that neatly folded piece of paper and my husband said he knew I was going to win that harmonica.
Funny how we each think one thing and then something different happens. It just continues to show to me that I'm not in control of the big picture. God is. Its comforting to know that I don't have to "plan" out everything.
Lyrics to a song I heard last night:
Not Mine Anyway
I don't know what to say
No words could ever be enough
I stand up because you hold me here
Because you brought me here tonight
Without you we all fall down
Without you we all fall
You make life worth living
You make me want to start giving
More and more away to you
It's not mine anyway
I could not ever try so hard
I could buy a place in your heart
But here I am
My name written on your hands
Because you paid the debt I owe
Without you we all fall down
Without you we all fall
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
GOD ROOM
Do I leave room for God to work in my life?
Do I leave room for God to orchestrate his plan in my life?
Do I leave room for God to be in control of my life?
These questions fumble around in my head. I would like to think that I do but that would be a lie since I"m only human and I can get caught up in "my own way" without thinking at times.
God Room
I need to Let Go & Let God (I've heard that saying bunches of times I'm sure you have too)
Let God have room to work in my heart, body and soul. Let go of "my way". Let go of my ideas and plans and allow God Room.
Dear Heavenly Father,
Please nudge me to get my attention to help me make God Room for you . To give You room to work in my life on a moment to moment bases in my life.
Thank you in your name I pray Amen
Do I leave room for God to orchestrate his plan in my life?
Do I leave room for God to be in control of my life?
These questions fumble around in my head. I would like to think that I do but that would be a lie since I"m only human and I can get caught up in "my own way" without thinking at times.
God Room
I need to Let Go & Let God (I've heard that saying bunches of times I'm sure you have too)
Let God have room to work in my heart, body and soul. Let go of "my way". Let go of my ideas and plans and allow God Room.
Dear Heavenly Father,
Please nudge me to get my attention to help me make God Room for you . To give You room to work in my life on a moment to moment bases in my life.
Thank you in your name I pray Amen
Friday, July 2, 2010
My Coffee Chat
This morning I met with a delightful, inspiring person. I had invited her for coffee at my house. She is leading the summer ladies bible study that I've been attending. It's the study on Esther. I've really enjoyed the lessons. The first moment I had met her I noticed something about her that put the idea and feeling inside that she would be someone that I wanted to talk to and add to my circle of friends.
After we greeted each other and poured our coffee she started telling me about a situation that led her to give it up to her husband to handle instead of her handling it in a different manner. She didn't get very far into her story when I heard the light bulb click on in my head and a big smile came to my face. As she continued to share other things about herself I felt like she was describing me in so many ways. We had several things in common. The many trials we go through help us to help others.
I knew that once again this was another person that God placed in my path. This path of Love & Respect. We could have talked all day but she had to leave at 11:00 and I had some errands to run too. I know that this was only one of many more coffee chats to come.
After we greeted each other and poured our coffee she started telling me about a situation that led her to give it up to her husband to handle instead of her handling it in a different manner. She didn't get very far into her story when I heard the light bulb click on in my head and a big smile came to my face. As she continued to share other things about herself I felt like she was describing me in so many ways. We had several things in common. The many trials we go through help us to help others.
I knew that once again this was another person that God placed in my path. This path of Love & Respect. We could have talked all day but she had to leave at 11:00 and I had some errands to run too. I know that this was only one of many more coffee chats to come.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
God's Preparations
Several weeks ago I was waiting to go into the church service and as I passed by the library a book caught my attention. It was sitting on the display shelf with several others. I went to it, only that one and grabbed it as if I had already planned on looking for it. I read the title, looked over the back cover, smiled thinking it sounded interesting and checked it out and went on my way. The book is called Love & Respect (The Love she most desires and The Respect he desperately needs) by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs .I started reading it right after church that afternoon. I was hooked after the first paragraph. I heard a whisper say to me that this will be the perfect book and the right time on my journey to read.
________
A few days later we were driving out to Cameron for Navajo Tacos and so the boys could ride their dirt bikes. On the way there I had been reading the book. I looked up from it and asked my husband if he thought I respected him. He looked puzzled and then said that he couldn't answer that he didn't know. I asked him to think about it for a while and then I'd ask him again.
_________
I met a friend for coffee and she asked me if I was reading a book right now and if so what was it. So I told her what it was and she knew immediately about it. She had read it a long time ago. She said that she would get her copy of it out and refresh herself with it so that if I had any questions or comments we could talk about it. I liked the idea. Ironically our conversation that morning went around love and respect. About how my actions and words could lead to a more loving response from him. His actions would start coming across better, in a more loving way that I would respond with respect.
_________
Apparently I hadn't been listening very well to what the Lord was trying to whisper to me about so I could start applying and practicing some of the things that I had read and discussed with my friend already. He placed a day in my path that I wish had gone a little differently. It was a rough day between my husband and I. You know the type of day, ugly words exchanged, harsh actions and hurtful glances. (note: from that bad day to a week I had set the book aside and refused to look at it, touch or read it)
A few days after that ugly day we met with one of the pastors from our church. A few minutes into the conversation as I listened to what he had to ask and say to my husband a smile appeared on my face with a sideways glance up above my head. I said to myself to God "ok ok I hear you now"
The angle the pastor took was on the subject of Love and Respect.
God had placed that book in my hands. He had set up the coffee conversation that morning. He nudged me to speak up and ask my husband the question. He was in control on the bad day when I was out of control. He gave the pastor the words that went into my ears so I could think about them as they settled in my mind.
God prepares us for his lessons that he places in our hearts as he works on us. God prepares our hearts for Him.
I have continued to read the book, I'm almost finished with it. I will take in the words and assignment from the pastor to heart and work through them and apply them so that my relationship with my husband will continue to grow with Christ in the center. With friends that were placed in my path to offer support and encouragement I will explore Love & Respect and get back with you all as I learn this life lesson.
________
A few days later we were driving out to Cameron for Navajo Tacos and so the boys could ride their dirt bikes. On the way there I had been reading the book. I looked up from it and asked my husband if he thought I respected him. He looked puzzled and then said that he couldn't answer that he didn't know. I asked him to think about it for a while and then I'd ask him again.
_________
I met a friend for coffee and she asked me if I was reading a book right now and if so what was it. So I told her what it was and she knew immediately about it. She had read it a long time ago. She said that she would get her copy of it out and refresh herself with it so that if I had any questions or comments we could talk about it. I liked the idea. Ironically our conversation that morning went around love and respect. About how my actions and words could lead to a more loving response from him. His actions would start coming across better, in a more loving way that I would respond with respect.
_________
Apparently I hadn't been listening very well to what the Lord was trying to whisper to me about so I could start applying and practicing some of the things that I had read and discussed with my friend already. He placed a day in my path that I wish had gone a little differently. It was a rough day between my husband and I. You know the type of day, ugly words exchanged, harsh actions and hurtful glances. (note: from that bad day to a week I had set the book aside and refused to look at it, touch or read it)
A few days after that ugly day we met with one of the pastors from our church. A few minutes into the conversation as I listened to what he had to ask and say to my husband a smile appeared on my face with a sideways glance up above my head. I said to myself to God "ok ok I hear you now"
The angle the pastor took was on the subject of Love and Respect.
God had placed that book in my hands. He had set up the coffee conversation that morning. He nudged me to speak up and ask my husband the question. He was in control on the bad day when I was out of control. He gave the pastor the words that went into my ears so I could think about them as they settled in my mind.
God prepares us for his lessons that he places in our hearts as he works on us. God prepares our hearts for Him.
I have continued to read the book, I'm almost finished with it. I will take in the words and assignment from the pastor to heart and work through them and apply them so that my relationship with my husband will continue to grow with Christ in the center. With friends that were placed in my path to offer support and encouragement I will explore Love & Respect and get back with you all as I learn this life lesson.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Always Hope
The last several days have not been all that wonderful. Sure the normal little things of life have been there with the kids, things needing to get done around the house but there have been other things going on lately that had sort of dimmed the light at the end of the tunnel.
Have you ever had a situation that starts with one thing and then harsh words are exchanged and then before you know it what started out with one thing ends up to really be about several other things and by this point things are at their ugliest? I think it would be safe for all of us to answer yes. Situations like that seem to happen so easily and quickly when we are in our selfish mode, don't stop to listen, don't pay attention to the little red flags of warning popping up to tell us to walk away and chill out for a bit then go back and talk it out later.
Life is full of moments that are ugly and I know that those are the moments I need to pay attention to and really look at to learn and grow from despite how many tears I shed out of sadness, brokenness, frustrations and remorse.
These last few days I have learned more about being patient and still, to listen with my heart, to look at myself to redirect back to the center where the true counselor in my life is, and to be humble and ask for forgiveness from the ones that was in my path of ugliness.
During the most desperate feeling of being alone in that dark tunnel it didn't take long to stop and take another look down that tunnel and see that there was a light. A light of shining hope.
I believe that there is always a light of shining hope at the end of the tunnel......always
John 14: 15-17a
"If you love Me, you will keep My commandments. And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Counselor to be with you forever. He is the Spirit of truth.
John 14: 25-26
"I have spoken these things to you while I remain wit you. But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit the Father will send Him in My name-will teach you all things and remind you of everything I have told you."
John 14: 27
"Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Your heart must not be troubled or fearful.
Always have peace knowing that THERE IS A SHINING LIGHT OF HOPE at the end of the tunnel.
Have you ever had a situation that starts with one thing and then harsh words are exchanged and then before you know it what started out with one thing ends up to really be about several other things and by this point things are at their ugliest? I think it would be safe for all of us to answer yes. Situations like that seem to happen so easily and quickly when we are in our selfish mode, don't stop to listen, don't pay attention to the little red flags of warning popping up to tell us to walk away and chill out for a bit then go back and talk it out later.
Life is full of moments that are ugly and I know that those are the moments I need to pay attention to and really look at to learn and grow from despite how many tears I shed out of sadness, brokenness, frustrations and remorse.
These last few days I have learned more about being patient and still, to listen with my heart, to look at myself to redirect back to the center where the true counselor in my life is, and to be humble and ask for forgiveness from the ones that was in my path of ugliness.
During the most desperate feeling of being alone in that dark tunnel it didn't take long to stop and take another look down that tunnel and see that there was a light. A light of shining hope.
I believe that there is always a light of shining hope at the end of the tunnel......always
John 14: 15-17a
"If you love Me, you will keep My commandments. And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Counselor to be with you forever. He is the Spirit of truth.
John 14: 25-26
"I have spoken these things to you while I remain wit you. But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit the Father will send Him in My name-will teach you all things and remind you of everything I have told you."
John 14: 27
"Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Your heart must not be troubled or fearful.
Always have peace knowing that THERE IS A SHINING LIGHT OF HOPE at the end of the tunnel.
Heavenly Father, You are all-knowing and all-powerful. You know every decision I need to make and every challenge I face. Please forgive me for the times that I try to figure this life out on my own. I need You. I need Your Holy Spirit to give me strength, wisdom, and direction, specifically concerning ______________. (you know what is in my heart as others have things in their hearts)
In Jesus' Name I pray,
Amen.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
My Family
My Family. I'm so blessed to have a wonderful husband that provides for us and loves us. I'm blessed with 4 children that keeps me running around with lots to do, never boring. I enjoy the smiles, laughter, hugs, kisses, frowns and tears. I Love you Lord and I'm so thankful that you are right there watching over each of my loved ones. I love my family so much. Thank you Lord for blessing us with each other.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Only a concert?
Music to a mother’s heart
My ears ring with good noise flowing in and out…
My heart aches with happiness and hope....
The words that came from my daughters mouth that were expressed with deep emotion were her truth. Her truth came from the inside out. My face smiled but my heart leapt with joy as I watched my daughter and listened to her. If I wasn’t so happy I probably would of cried happy tears.
Sometimes I feel like I repeat myself often and that no one hears. I wonder if some of the “seed” I’ve planted has taken root yet. I’m realizing now that God has been there nurturing the “seeds” in my daughter’s heart.
Different things can trigger growth in someone. It could be a memory, a word spoken, an action expressed, a soothing scent, a glance around or a song. A song sung out loudly with so many people crammed into a room with bright lights.
A concert…
The whole atmosphere can be powerful and through it all God can be there beside you holding your hand, working inside you as you enjoy the music. My daughter may have attended a concert and enjoyed the music and fellowship with her friends but she walked away with a new thought in her head and a new message written on her heart.
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