Chilly Days

The other day Karlee and I went up to snow bowl to meet up with the photographer that was going to take her senior pictures.  It was beautiful up there but very cold.  I stayed in the background while Karlee had her pictures taken.  I didn't have my camera with me.  I wish I did but I had my phone.  I couldn't help but take a quite moment to sit in silence, feeling the cool crisp air on my skin.  It refreshed me as I sat looking around at my surroundings, I sought out the Lord in that moment and gave him the ache in my heart with missing my daddy.

I had ordered some new candles from a friend that sells Gold Canyon candles.  I just got them and lite them up.....they smell so yummy.  Peach and Pumpkin :)  Can't help but bring a little Fall in the house .

Today was so cold!  A cold winter like feel of a day!  Where did Fall go?  Hello winter! But I have a comfy soft blanket and a cute warm dog to keep me cozy.

This morning I woke up a little emotional.  I miss being able to pick up the phone and talk to my dad.

No matter the day, cold or warm, emotional or joyful He will be my peace.

God Made My Day

Yesterday was Saturday, one week after the memorial service we had for my dad.  I didn't want to participate in life, I cried most of the day and avoided life.

I will share the story of my last couple of weeks soon....but until I'm ready to do that life must go on while I process and learn to live a new normal with a huge gap in my life without my daddy in it.

Today I woke up at 8:00 and grabbed my phone and texted my neighbor, who has become such a good friend to me ever since she moved back from Colorado.  I sent her a message asking her what time she would leaving for church.  Part of me wanted to hide again from the world but I knew I didn't want to get stuck.  So I told myself to get up and get in the shower to get going and get ready for church no matter what.

(She and I have been checking out a different church than we have been going.)

I went next door to get in her vehicle to leave.  I still found myself wanting to escape but I didn't.  We arrived and I felt a little worried that I would get emotional during the worship music.  She said that would be alright.

The music began and the heart started to ache but I felt engulfed by His presence around me :)  tears shortly followed after about the 3rd song.

We left afterward and went to her house to continue our conversation that we started in the car about the sermon and things that had caused her anxious and some stress last week.  We enjoyed warm apple cider, cheese and pumpkin cranberry crackers together, with a chill in the air and cloudy sky, we felt fall and felt warm and cozy inside.

After I left her house I went to ask my daughter Sara, if she wanted to go with me to the bookstore.  I asked her along the way if she was hungry and what she wanted to eat.  She said she didn't know....but I did :)  so I asked her again and with a huge smile she said Wildflower!  So we enjoyed bread bowls with our favorite potato cream cheese soup!

We walked into the bookstore, the air was cool and crisp, it felt good.

Later at home my husband and I enjoyed a cup of hot chai tea.

Soon in the late afternoon my friend returned home and I went next door to give a little gift and we shared conversation for a little while and parted ways for the day.

Between church, music, cool crisp air, hot drinks, warm soup and good company God made my day!

Very thankful

I am broken
but God fills in the pieces
and He is my strength and my hope.

Life Hits!

Sometimes life hits you when least expect it!  What do you do when that happens....you roll with it and take one moment at a time until that day is over and then you start all over again.

From Thursday to Saturday Life was hitting me over and over it seemed....now its Sunday morning around 8:20 am before I go over to Jane's, not sure if I will get a break today but we'll see.

Thursday:  I'm at Jane's and I get a phone call from the high school.  I looked at the time and realized that Karlee was already out and that only meant one other person they would be calling me a about, my son.  I froze with concern, not sure why but most of the time when I see one of the schools call me in the middle of the day I sort of panic a little.

It was the school nurse.








Friday:  Karlee's 18th Birthday







Saturday:  Thought I'd spend the whole day home and clean.....nope it wasn't my day after all!


I realize this post is not finished and its October 10th but I think its fitting when life hits....life just goes on which will lead into my next sad post......I'm numb inside for now....not sure when I will get around to writing my story that started unexpected and ended so quickly with my daddy going onto Heaven.  I need some time but I will share...its my way of processing and healing.  All I ask is to keep my family in your prayers.