First Week Down-New Job

 Today is Sunday, July 24th around 4:30 p.m. Ben has been smoking meat all day and we have been doing some meal prepping today for the week.  Since going back to work I don't have a ton of energy to want to come home and cook.  I hope we can keep up on doing a little meal planning and prepping on the weekends because I know it will help during the week.  It's been a very wet and rainy day today. I enjoyed talking to my mom this afternoon, in fact it helped a bunch.  She was able to put some of my feelings into words that I couldn't and didn't know they were there until she and I started to talk about last week.  

It was a good week, very busy and very tiring.  The week kicked my butt!  After being at home for so long and out of routine has taken its toll.  I like the people so far and the job itself, thats not the issue.  The thing is with me.  Its going to take time to get back in the game of working with my mind, and body.  I struggled some with both but I know it will take time to get back in the groove.  It's hard to explain and I will have to think about it more and try to put my thoughts here but for now I'll just be a little general.  I'm tired and not able to focus now.

I'm ready for a new week.  I will have to keep telling myself that I'm capable and I will adapt and I'll be alright.  I will have to share and not complain but I guess complain a tiny bit about the working area at the one location and express that in order to do the best job I can, I'll need to make a few adjustments to the desk area, chair and things like that.  One location has a better set up with the desk and chair.  I will have to go back and forth for now until they hire all the people they need to hire.  I'm going to try not to say much for a bit and then I will have to, I just don't like to say much about my fibromyalgia and arthritis in my knees, I don't want to play that role a victim and complainer.  Some I have seen take it way out there and let it run their life.  I've never done that with any thing in my life. I'm not going to start now, but I'm finding things becoming a little harder and less energy and that bothers me and I'm not sure how to deal with that but I guess I will take it one day at a time and keep moving forward and do the best that I can.

Wrapping up my unemployment days

 This is the last week I have to be at home or finding things to do.  Monday I start my new job.  This week I have the mind set of finishing up any projects that I had started or wanted to do since I have so much time at home. Yesterday was a struggle for me, I found myself restless and unsettled, but the end of the day it turned out to be peaceful and not so bad of a day.  Monday Ben had stayed home so it was nice to have him home and it felt like an extension to the weekend. Yesterday, Tuesday I started off missing my daughters and not knowing what to do to keep myself busy.  The day was cloudy, cool and rainy so it just added to my mood even more.  I managed to plant two plants that I hadn't done yet out front in the flower beds.  I snap chatted back and forth with Sara, so that was a huge plus.  She wasn't feeling good though so that made it hard since I wasn't there with her or she wasn't here with me.  I also did the laundry and cleaned the kitchen so that was productive.  Then most of the afternoon I listened to music, played around with creating playlists on my Spotify and cuddling under a light blanket on the couch with the window open watching and listening to the rain for a couple of hours.  It was a very restful afternoon.

Oh and I did manage to make a cute arrangement out back to plant the bulbs before it rained!

It came down good with hail for a little while.

I was enjoying watching the rain drops fall into the water of the bird bath.

It rained and rained and rained......very nice!

Today, Wednesday I headed to town early this morning.  I didn't feel like sitting in the house all day again by myself.  I actually left at 8:00 a.m. this morning to do a test run for Monday.  I have to be at work at 9:00 a.m. and we have some construction going on and different times of the day it takes a long time, almost hours to get to town so I wanted to see what it would be like at that time.  It turned out just fine.  It seems that if I head to town it needs to be before 10:00 a.m. because any later than that it will get bogged down and you have to sit for hours and hours.

I decided that would do something from a distance to try to help Sara feel better so I headed to Over Easy where she used to work. I had a plan, I would hope that either I would recognize a few of her co-workers or they would know who I am and then I'd ask if we could send a snap chat to Sara.  The plan worked perfectly and I found very willing participants.   When Sara finally was able to check her snapchat about mid-morning she sent her smiling face letting me know that it made her day.  I was happy since that was what I was hoping it would do.

After I ate breakfast I went to run a few errands,  I went to Dollar Tree and found a few containers to continue organizing things around the house, from there I went to Sprouts.  I wanted to shop their supplements and found a few that I was looking into trying.  My last stop was Barnes and Noble, I found a few books.  I always find a few books, I love the bargain section.  I found a fun book with making my own scrubs and bath bombs with essential oils.  A poetry book, I used to love reading poems so I thought I'd add it to my daily time to start my days. Okay so instead of just one or two books I confess I came home with five books.  I found a cool herbal apothecary books with info on healing herbs and essential oils. I've been wanting to try to do yoga at home but where I live my internet service stinks so I thought if I had a book I could do my own thing at home, so I found one. The last book I found deals with Turmeric and healing spices, remedies for health and well-being.

I got home around 11:00 a.m., took a bath and put on some relaxing clothing and then I straighten up and organized an area of Ben's stuff in the living room.  I ate some lunch and now I'm writing this blog post while the sky is really dark out side and thunder is rolling in the distance.  It hasn't started to rain yet but maybe soon.

I only have Thursday and Friday to wrap up my self-care, organizing, me time, journey.  I'm a little sad but happy at the same time.  I've learned a ton about slowing down and focusing on taking better care of myself and really trying to be intentional.  I will continue of course because its part of me and helps me stay balanced and together on all levels.  It will change next week and I will have to develop a new routine but it will all work out and I'm excited to start a new chapter in my story with a new job!

(Also looking forward to the weekend, Ben and I will be going to visit my oldest daughter and see her new apartment.  We will stay with her but we will also get to spend some time with my youngest daughter too so it will be a great weekend with my girls, my heart will be happy and full!)

July Visit to Mom's

 

July 9th, my daddy's birthday.  He would have been 71 years old.  I miss him a ton. Karlee, Natalie, Sara and Abbey got together for a little pizza party in honor of their papa. 

July 10th, I love waking up in the extra bedroom at my mom's.  I love the window, and the feeling I feel when I first wake up.  I feel refreshed and ready for the day.

I always seem to pick my mom's sunflower cup to use when I go visit her at her house.

Mom and Larry have been working hard on their yard, growing new grass.  Its looking really good.

Larry relaxing in the morning.

Mom and I trying the Amber Riesling that I found.

While we were waiting to try out a place we had never been to for dinner their were 3 hummingbirds I was only able to catch one of them, they move so fast.

(We ended up leaving and not eating there because they wait was going to be really long)

So we ended up a favorite, Averys.  Its a bar and a BBQ- place.  Yummy food!  My favorite are the BQ-Rolls and the sweet potato fries.

And of course mom and I enjoyed a wine & paint night both Friday and Saturday night.

It was a good weekend.  It was too short and I miss my mom already but there is so much to do before I start my new job.  Next weekend Ben and I will go to Phoenix to visit Karlee and Sara.  We will get to see Karlee's and Nat's new apartment and spend some time with all of them.

Next Monday I start my new job!

A Job A Job!!!

 I'm a little behind in sharing the really great news along with a mix of other news too!  I had a zoom interview on June 30th with a couple of ladies that work for a charter school.  They were looking to fill two positions at two different schools in the offices.  The interview went great!  Then it went to the waiting period, they said they wanted to make a decision soon since they were both going vacation.

Friday on July 2nd I went to town to go to Safeway and meet Scott in the parking lot of Safeway to get a jar of homemade salsa that he had made.  While waiting on him I sat in the car checking my email.  I came across an email from the ladies that I interviewed with on Wed. asking for references and it expressed to do it as quickly as possible because they were moving onto the next phase of the interview process.  

So I sat there looking around for something to write with and to write on.  I found a small receipt from the ATM, I dug out a pen from the bottom of my purse.  I looked in my phone for all the info to send on four people.  One I worked with, one that has known me since I've lived here in AZ, one that I live with, and my ex-manager.  I responded to the email as quickly as I could and sent it off then went on about the rest of my morning.

I was driving home from town and I started to pray/talk out loud to God.  I do that sometimes, anyways I was just saying out loud how I think that the job at the school would be a great fit for me.  I carried on for a few a minutes and then continued my way home.

I'd been home for a few hours when my phone rang around 1:00 p.m., I saw that the number came from one of the ladies that I interviewed with from the school.  My heart jumped and then I took a deep breathe and answered the call.

I was almost in tears with so much joy and excitement going on inside of me after I heard her offer me the job! I accepted the job and was told the time and date to start. As soon as I got off the phone I was jumping up and down and running around the house laughing and crying at the same time, shouting out thank you Lord thank you!  I called my mom and then texted my kids and called Susan (Ben's mom).  I didn't tell Ben until he got home I didn't want to do it on the phone.

Susan actually knew before me because she ended up knowing one of the ladies.  She had worked with her at the bank a long time ago.  

I was on cloud nine the rest of the day and weekend.  It felt so good to know that I finally had job to go to.

___________________________

Monday morning on July 5th I checked my unemployment bank account on the app on my phone and the money wasn't showing that it hit yet.  I found it odd because when I do my claim on Sunday it will show on Monday.  I decided to look it up on the main site from my computer.  I discovered that my I had exhausted my benefits. Well that put me into a spin of emotions!  What was I suppose to do to pay my bills until I started my new job?  I started to freak out some and then I took a deep breathe and sat down at my table and just sat still for a little while.

I took a deep breathe and composed an email to send to the guy that handles my last little bit of my investment money.  I sent the email and waited maybe an hour and then I couldn't wait any longer I needed to figure this out and could not wait.  I called and left a message.  An hour after that he called and then we made a plan.  I'm so happy and relieved that I reached out.  I will only have to take a small amount out and pay off 5 credit cards to gain a little breathing room.  Then we discussed taking a slightly bigger chuck of money into a different account to try to increase my money.

I find myself feeling alright and knowing that things will be just fine.  I'm also feeling like a huge weight has been lifted off of me between the stress of looking for a job, finding one, then losing benefits.....I was so weighed down.  Its really nice not having to look for a job daily.

July 5th 2021

 

Sara's paintinig

My painting

There are times when we paint we usually end up doing at least two paintings but on this night we started painting early and ended up only doing one because we talked more than we painted this time.  Sara needed to talk so I listened.  It was a nice time and I'm thankful that I can be a listening ear to her.  I'm thankful for our time together.  We didn't go to bed until midnight.

The next day she left around 11:00 a.m. to head to her dad's to spend some time with him before her hair appointment at 3:30 p.m.  After her hair appointment she headed back to her home in Phoenix.  The moment she left I had that empty feeling in my tummy.  Its never going to get easy having to part ways....

Fourth of July 2021

Sunday, the 4th of July was relaxing and fun.  Ben and I played corn hole on and off all day from about 10:30 a.m. until the early evening.  Susan joined us for awhile too and that was nice.  What made the day even better was when Sara got here in the evening.  She and Abby left after Sara got off work.  They left on Tuesday evening.  It was a good visit and still so hard to let her go back to her new home in Phoenix.

 

Ben's new shirt!

Corn hole fun!

The bear has returned!!!

My baby is back!

Enjoyed some time out back on the porch.

My little miss sunshine!

Look at that smile!!

I love it when I get to see a rainbow!  What a blessing, thank you God :)

 A beautiful ending to a fun day! 

July 3, 2021

 

Ben took me to the first Annual Wine Festival in Williams, AZ. 

I love going places with him.  But on this day he was in a funk for some reason but I made the most of it.

It was a little lonely sampling wine by myself but I enjoyed it.

What a guy! Treating me to a bottle of wine that I found that I really liked :)

Look at all those clouds! We timed it good, on our way home from there it started to rain.

I came home with red and a resiling.  

It was a nice way to start a relaxing, wet and rainy Saturday.

First day of July

 I decided to finally go to Violas by myself.  It sounds like no big deal and easy but it was for me.  In fact it took courage to go by myself.  Oh Violas is a cool outdoor gardening/flower place!  I have had a couple of gift certificates from my birthday that I've been wanting to use.  The last couple of years Ben, Susan and I have gone together to go plant/flower shopping.  We have had fun and enjoyed the experience of going together.  This years has been so busy and it has not really had us all together and the its already the beginning of July so I wanted to get some flowers and plants planted soon.

I decided the other morning that I was going to get up and go by myself.  Its a big deal for me for a couple of reason and some might think they are silly but it is what it is for me.  The first being that I would go by myself, to venture out doing something without any one.  I have found over the years that I don't think I can for some reason that I can go out and about like buying flowers without any help.  I think its because I enjoy going with others.  Now with all the kids out of the house it seems to make me want to stay home and dwell on that fact a little.  It also says that I'm alone, well not really alone but....you know now that I'm trying to put it all in words its hard and I'm not sure it makes sense.

The second reason, and again you will think its silly, is that to get there I have to navigate two turnabouts in the road.  I conquered that fear the day I went and was proud of myself that I didn't stress or freak out about entering it and then coming out where I needed to go just fine.  I find them confusing and stressful mostly.  Its a silly fear but I've always had issues with them.  I have gotten better at times.

Once I got there to Violas, I enjoyed the idea of really taking a long slow stroll around the whole area before I went and got a cart to start picking out what I wanted to get.  I ended up focusing on plants that will grow well in the shade with very limited sun.  We had one side of the planters that are in the shade and have failed with other plants in the passed.

I picked out my plants and headed home to plant them.  It was a great day to plant with the sky being cloudy and a little cool with a light rain at times.  I hope they will work out, they are suppose to come back next year so we shall see.

Wrapping up the end of June

As you can see with the pictures below that I spent the last part of June enjoying a few of my favorite things.

 

PAINTING

HANGING OUT IN THE HAMMOCK

LOOKING UP WHILE OUTDOORS 

GOING FOR A SHORT WALK AND ENJOYING WHAT I SAW ALONG THE WAY.

SPENDING TIME WITH THIS GUY!