My son is tall and he has to lean over to hug me. I have to sort of stand on my tippy toes to reach him and stand there to hold him when he allows me to linger a bit during a hug.
My son is quite and keeps to himself but can be the life of the party with his laughter, funny voices, and smile, when he is surrounded by family and friends.
My son is a very sensitive person. He is very caring and dedicated. He is very protective of his family. He has a handful of close trusted friends. he would do anything to help a friend in need.
My son has a tender heart and he struggles when he has been let down. He also has a temper but he is aware of it and works hard to keep it in check when things get heated. He says he is sorry when he is wrong.
My son thrives on routine and feeling secure.
My son loves to relax with his video games after he has had a long day of work.
All this to say is that its hard to see my kids struggle. My heart aches for them. I can't fix things for them, like when they were small but even then. Two of my kids are young adults living on their own making decisions daily. I have to be there with comfort, encouragement or a little guidance and then let them go.
Yesterday Kyle came over briefly on his way home from work. Dinner was just being put in the oven. He was tired and just wanted to go home. I gathered up leftovers from the night before and some Texas Chocolate Sheet cake that I had made in honor of his birthday (2/23/19 turned 19).
He lingered for a bit, shared small talk with Ben and then soon he released it. He shared his frustrations with his friend/roommate. He was hurting and struggling with doing what he knew was right to keep the peace while his friend was treating him ugly.
He talked and talked, he needed to. Ben and I listened. I did tell him how proud I was with how he was handling the situations. I know it was hard for him but he knew it was the right thing to do. He knows he has to make the most of it until things improve or until he can live on his own when their least is up.
He doesn't understand what the problem is with his friend. He tried to talk to him and help him but he just got mean with his words and actually shoved Kyle and shouted out for the neighbors to hear. He walks around in silence and ignores Kyle. It is hurting Kyle and he just wants his friend to chill out and recognize how he is acting and say sorry.
Kyle came over to give me a hug before he left. I was in the kitchen. He bent down and our arms went around each other and then he let it out. He lingered and lingered and I help on to him tight and gently swayed while he clung to on to me as well and relaxed and safely was able to release his emotions and his tears of frustration on my shoulder.
My heart was full but ached at the same time for him. It was such a deep moment, a moment to cherish. I held him until he was ready to release his arms from around me and then he was ready to wipe his eyes, take a deep breath and go home to his place and face the silence again.
During our embrace I told him how much I loved him, how proud I was of him and how much I knew this was hard and how he was struggling. I encouraged him to keep doing what he knews to do, to hang in there and that it would be alright. I encouraged to let it out and that I was there for him and always will be.
He cried. He cried hard and I held him.
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