Today started out alright. I took Sara to go clean at the office. Then we came home for a little bit before I headed over to the Milton's to clean their apartment. It was about mid morning, maybe around 10:30 or so. I sat down at my table looking at the time trying to decide when I would call Larry to wish him a Happy Father's Day. Larry is my step-dad and I love him and care about him. He has done a lot for myself and my kids. He loves my mother and has made her happy for a several years now. But I had a moment when I found it hard to call him, not because I didn't want to....just found it a little hard. I picked up my phone and gave him a call. He sounded happy that I did and we chatted for a few minutes about what he was up to and the weather, then I talked to my mom for a little bit. I was happy that I called him, he sounded like he liked me calling him and that made me happy.
I couldn't help it not long after I sat there and I couldn't hold back, I did two things. The first one was I texted Micah and told him that I was having a hard time. He figured I would and said he was sorry. The second was that I let a few tears come forward. I wiped my eyes, blew my nose and took a deep breath and called up stairs to Sara to let her know that I was going to go over and clean at the Miltons.
I got in my car and lost it. I couldn't hold back. I started to cry. I put a song on to listen to loudly as I drove over to the house. I needed to have a good cry and that is what I did. I maintained safely so I could drive. I played a song by Alabama, called "No Bad Days" Its a song that brings comfort to me when I think of my dad. I'm not sure why. Its not a song we listened to or anything together.
No Bad Days daddy.....
I will look up the lyrics and post them soon.
After I cleaned, I came home and took a shower and got dressed for the day. Sara and I went to Safeway to get a few things I needed so I could make a pasta salad to take out to Scott's for dinner tonight. He was cooking and the kids were going to go spend time with him, being Father's Day and all. He asked me to join them and so I said I would.
The rest of the afternoon and evening I was a little sad but you wouldn't know it to look at me. I browsed online on facebook and schemed through all the posts and pictures of other's sharing about their dads and families.
Enjoyed a nice dinner and then the girls and I came home to relax the rest of the evening.
As the day had gone on and I missed my dad and thought of him, I couldn't help but think of everything that has gone on lately.....but I have pushed through and soon I will be calling it a night, with a new day tomorrow. Thankful for my Lord and Savior who is holding me in his arms right now. Tomorrow is a new day.
No Bad Days.....
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