I am Here! Rest in Me

(Saturday Feb 16)

Saturday I went to take pictures at a baby shower.  From the moment I gathered up my camera and things I felt sort of off balance.  I smiled and said "see ya later to my husband" and wished my son good luck on his Upwards basketball game.

I found myself feeling reserved and hiding in the back ground of the shower as people arrived.  I knew most everyone.  A couple of days now I've been feeling emotional but I was there to do what I enjoy doing...take pictures.

After taking a few pre-pics of the table setting and decorations my battery dies.  Its a new camera and I had made sure it was charged before the shower.  This quickly added to my unrest that I'd been struggling with from the start.

As I was stressing about my camera the working around me for the final touches being put out were going calmly and happy with joy--no stress.  Even knowing that I may not be able to take pictures didn't change a thing that was going on around me according the ladies getting things ready.

Soon I was brought a little point and shoot camera.  I thought okay I'll use it while my battery was charging and the guest of honor was running late so it was all good....for the the battery to have time to charge.

Well the little point and shoot camera dies after taking only two pictures.  I didn't get what was going on!  Was it not mean for me to take pictures or what!?

Soon I was approached and hugged saying "maybe you are not here to take pictures, maybe you are her to relax and enjoy some girl time."

It made sense and I was stressed but I just couldn't let it go.  There were a few others that came u to me...expressing positiveness and joy.  God was using them to get my attention...

I did manage to take some pictures with my camera.  It was nice to be around everyone and hear cute stories being shared with a little advice for the mom to be.  I did enjoy thinking about my kids being so small and what it was like to be a new mom.

But I still felt like I was looking in from the outside.  I'm not sure why I felt the way I did and it bothered me greatly.

Looking back now I do see God was there with me and I went back and forth with my own agenda and His.  His did win out in the end.

Before leaving the shower I received a text from my husband. 
 My step son had been arrested for shop lifting at Sears.  (He left the house before Thanksgiving)

(next post is the next moment in my Saturday)