Micah comes home tomorrow, that puts a smile on my face. He is done for a few weeks in Camp Verde so he will be around here doing other jobs. I'm looking forward to this this weekend. It's our anniversary on Saturday and we are going out of town for the night. I have all the kids confirmed for where they will be while we are gone. We will all have our own little adventures this weekend.
I laugh a little when I think about mine coming up. Sherman Williams does all sorts of things for their clients and one of them is to give out tickets to the NAU games and do tailgate parties before each game (the food is always so yummy!) So this trip to Tucson is to watch a football game. A representative from Sherman Williams will be going around on Saturday starting at 9:00 a.m. in a bus picking up 5 other couples including Micah and I. We will be driven to Tucson, enjoy yummy food at the tail gate party, watch a football game, stay in a paid for room and be driven back sometime on Sunday.
So I laugh because all I feel like we are in high school again, going on a bus with a bunch of other people heading out to a game for food and fun.
I really think it will be fun. I feel like I can just relax hanging out with my husband sort of like we were kids again with not a worry in sight (kids taken care of and doggies too)
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Monday, August 29, 2011
FUN, LAUGHTER, SMILES & LOVE
Saturday morning we were in the kitchen and one of the kids asked what all was going on today. Micah announces that he was taking me to Lake Mary to jet ski. I smiled and Sara was a little disappointed because she wanted to go, but Micah said that it was just going to be the two of us. Don't worry everyone went there separate ways with friends and had fun too.
So we get to Lake Mary and discovered that it was very busy with bunches of people and boats. We joked with the lady that we paid for parking that everyone must be practicing for the next weekend (labor day weekend).
We get out on the water and Micah takes me for a ride. When you ride with Micah be prepared to hang on tight for all the sharp turns he takes, or spins into donuts, or giant waves that bounce you hard on the water and ends up splashing you with water. Its a lot of fun!
He takes us back to the dock and insists that I take it out by myself. I wasn't so sure about it but I said okay I guess I could and that I would take it easy and not go very fast. Well it wasn't long before I had a good feel of what to do and how to maneuver around out there on the water that I sort of forgot about "taking it easy and not going fast" :)
Micah said that from a distance he could see me smiling and having fun. As I got closer to the dock he said my face was beaming with a huge grin from ear to ear. It was so much fun, such a rush! I couldn't help but go on about it for a few minutes. Micah told me on our way home that he glad that I had a good time.
It truly was a good time, relaxed "let my hair" down fun time but most of all it was fun, laughter, smiles and love with my husband.
(we were tired but some how found the energy to go out on Sunday with Sara and have more fun despite the rain and hail that beat upon us while heading back to the dock. After the rain it was sunny, bright and warm again...I guess that is Flagstaff AZ for ya)
So we get to Lake Mary and discovered that it was very busy with bunches of people and boats. We joked with the lady that we paid for parking that everyone must be practicing for the next weekend (labor day weekend).
We get out on the water and Micah takes me for a ride. When you ride with Micah be prepared to hang on tight for all the sharp turns he takes, or spins into donuts, or giant waves that bounce you hard on the water and ends up splashing you with water. Its a lot of fun!
He takes us back to the dock and insists that I take it out by myself. I wasn't so sure about it but I said okay I guess I could and that I would take it easy and not go very fast. Well it wasn't long before I had a good feel of what to do and how to maneuver around out there on the water that I sort of forgot about "taking it easy and not going fast" :)
Micah said that from a distance he could see me smiling and having fun. As I got closer to the dock he said my face was beaming with a huge grin from ear to ear. It was so much fun, such a rush! I couldn't help but go on about it for a few minutes. Micah told me on our way home that he glad that I had a good time.
It truly was a good time, relaxed "let my hair" down fun time but most of all it was fun, laughter, smiles and love with my husband.
(we were tired but some how found the energy to go out on Sunday with Sara and have more fun despite the rain and hail that beat upon us while heading back to the dock. After the rain it was sunny, bright and warm again...I guess that is Flagstaff AZ for ya)
Amazing Love
My love for my children is huge! My love for my husband is strong! My love for my parents is always and true. My love for friends is there in their time of need (happy or not so happy). My love for my little doggies is dependable. My love for my Lord and Savior is indescribable but His love for me is amazing!
To be Held
When our children are small we love to hold them. Holding them close and snuggling our babies, comforting them and loving them. I loved those moments. As my kids have gotten bigger I can't really hold them like that anymore. Sara my youngest is the only one that I sort of can do that but it won't be much longer.
I remember as a child my mother holding me in her arms. She would hold me and snuggle and tell me how much she loved me. She would also hold me when I was upset and I could cry my little eyes out close in her arms. I felt loved and comforted by being held in my mother's arms.
Well I'm too big to be held by my mother. (besides she is so tiny and petite and only 5 foot tall and I'm taller than her...) There are times when I want to be held again like a child but who is there to hold me? There is someone and His hands and arms are strong enough to hold me, love me and comfort me.
My heavenly Father is there to hold me just as a mother holds her child. I've come to really love the feeling of His hands and arms around me. They bring such comfort to me when in my times of sorrow and such happiness in times of joy and celebration.
He is strong enough to hold all his children. I'm thankful that I am one of them. Thank you Lord for holding me. I love the way you hold me. It brings great comfort to my soul to be held by You.
Music can be so wonderful and help express the things we feel. I think Jamie Grace expresses it quite well with this song.
I remember as a child my mother holding me in her arms. She would hold me and snuggle and tell me how much she loved me. She would also hold me when I was upset and I could cry my little eyes out close in her arms. I felt loved and comforted by being held in my mother's arms.
Well I'm too big to be held by my mother. (besides she is so tiny and petite and only 5 foot tall and I'm taller than her...) There are times when I want to be held again like a child but who is there to hold me? There is someone and His hands and arms are strong enough to hold me, love me and comfort me.
My heavenly Father is there to hold me just as a mother holds her child. I've come to really love the feeling of His hands and arms around me. They bring such comfort to me when in my times of sorrow and such happiness in times of joy and celebration.
He is strong enough to hold all his children. I'm thankful that I am one of them. Thank you Lord for holding me. I love the way you hold me. It brings great comfort to my soul to be held by You.
Music can be so wonderful and help express the things we feel. I think Jamie Grace expresses it quite well with this song.
Friday, August 26, 2011
God is Worth it!
Everyday I live for Christ. I stumble at times but I know I can count on Him. I know He will give me the courage and strength that I need. He will supply me with the right words I need when I need them. I can trust Him to take my best effort and make it better. When I don't know who else to turn to in frustration or when the tears are rolling down my face and my heart is aching all I know to do is to reach out for Him. He is there for me on my bad days and good days. Serving God isn't easy at times and it doesn't mean its peaches and cream, and sunshine all the time. There will be rain and storms at times. Then there will be rainbows and cool breezes. It does mean that God's presence is with me and that His peace keeps my soul calm. It means that I need to obey Him and that is what he expects of me. I need to listen when he speaks to me through His Word, through the precious moments of time that need not to be looked over. That is okay with me because God your are worth it!
God is worth leaning on. God is worth giving up to. God is worth it! In every way, every moment of every day that I live.
(When I was writing this, a song came on in the background and it was this one. I thought it fit perfectly.)
God is worth leaning on. God is worth giving up to. God is worth it! In every way, every moment of every day that I live.
(When I was writing this, a song came on in the background and it was this one. I thought it fit perfectly.)
Thursday, August 25, 2011
I'm really not...
I'm really not....
I'm really not strong without you, Lord.
I'm not strong enough but He is.
I don't have to be strong to stand on my own two feet. I give up. There are times I fall and try to be on "my own". I can't! I can't be who I need to be without Him. I need His help. Its too much to do on my own. It causes hurt, pain, tiredness, irritablity, worries, ups and downs. There is no constant when I try to stand on my own. There is You and You are constant. I need You, Lord. I need to always remember you are there to take me and put me on my own two feet. I need You to be my strength. My stronghold. I need you Lord to be strong for me to be who I need to be for You, Lord.
Stand me up on my feet to be....
the child of God
the daughter
the wife
the mother
the friend
Thank you Lord for being the all powerful that is the only constant in my life. Thank you.
I'm really not strong without you, Lord.
I'm not strong enough but He is.
I don't have to be strong to stand on my own two feet. I give up. There are times I fall and try to be on "my own". I can't! I can't be who I need to be without Him. I need His help. Its too much to do on my own. It causes hurt, pain, tiredness, irritablity, worries, ups and downs. There is no constant when I try to stand on my own. There is You and You are constant. I need You, Lord. I need to always remember you are there to take me and put me on my own two feet. I need You to be my strength. My stronghold. I need you Lord to be strong for me to be who I need to be for You, Lord.
Stand me up on my feet to be....
the child of God
the daughter
the wife
the mother
the friend
Thank you Lord for being the all powerful that is the only constant in my life. Thank you.
Always something else going on....
It is so crazy, just when you think you've got things figured out in one area of your life and that things can finally start running smoothly then another area pops up needing work on it too. I feel like I'm finally figuring out things in my marriage but now in the kid area things have hit a rough patch.
As I have mentioned before Micah is out of town during the week and home on the weekends. The amount of time with the kids shouldn't seem any different than if he were here during the week but it is. I think its because he isn't here at night, at the end of the day when we are all tired. It seems right around early evening and into bed time the kids and I seem to start hitting heads. Yesterday Kyle lost his temper and threw his binder across the room and yelled at me that he wasn't going to talk to me anymore. Then later in the evening Karlee interrupted me while I was talking to Kyle and I asked her to hang on and she ran upstairs yelling at me in frustration telling me that she was going to stop talking to me too. I didn't know how to react, so I said whatever and went upstairs and sat out on the balcony and cried a little. I was hurt and frustrated. I don't remember talking to my parents the way mine do at times. Then I went to tuck Kyle in and he says that I don't love him or care about him and Karlee cried herself to sleep. So I felt like enough damage was done so I looked at the clock, it was 9:30 and decided that I would go to bed too. I just wanted the day to end and start again on a fresh note.
My kids have expressed to me that I seem irritable and mad when I respond to them and that it doesn't matter what they say or do. I don't think that I am but maybe. I'm constantly catching them on their tone of voice. Micah has mentioned that I too have a tone in my voice at times and before he left for this week he reminded me of that and gently told me to watch how I talk to them and see how they respond. Well I guess I've blown it this week. I'm feeling really discouraged and frustrated and not sure what to do. I feel like everything I do or say is wrong with the kids. I have noticed that there are times I have been impatient with them and irritable but its only after they have kept asking or doing something or not understanding what I'm trying to say or do.
I have been tired lately, feeling pretty good but tired by the end of the day. It could be because I'm actually working out everyday and so by the end of the day I'm really tired. I don't know but all I do know is that there is a disconnection right now between the kids and I. I need God's help in my dealings with my children. So I laid in bed this morning and prayed to God for his help and guidance.
So now I will just wait. I have asked God to reveal to me the things that I need to change and do differently and begin again when the kids come home today from school. I have asked him to help me show grace in my responses with my children. I've have asked him to help me keep my mouth shut, my ears open and give me time to respond quietly when needed.
I'm happy and very thankful to God that Karlee, Kyle and Dillon went to youth group last night. I hope they continue. I'm looking forward to tonight, going to the woman's worship at church. I'm going to take the girls so that all the kids aren't left here at the house by themselves to avoid any conflict that could arise. Karlee loves to sing, maybe tonight our hearts will be touched and things will be revealed to us and we come together in our communicating with each other again.
As I have mentioned before Micah is out of town during the week and home on the weekends. The amount of time with the kids shouldn't seem any different than if he were here during the week but it is. I think its because he isn't here at night, at the end of the day when we are all tired. It seems right around early evening and into bed time the kids and I seem to start hitting heads. Yesterday Kyle lost his temper and threw his binder across the room and yelled at me that he wasn't going to talk to me anymore. Then later in the evening Karlee interrupted me while I was talking to Kyle and I asked her to hang on and she ran upstairs yelling at me in frustration telling me that she was going to stop talking to me too. I didn't know how to react, so I said whatever and went upstairs and sat out on the balcony and cried a little. I was hurt and frustrated. I don't remember talking to my parents the way mine do at times. Then I went to tuck Kyle in and he says that I don't love him or care about him and Karlee cried herself to sleep. So I felt like enough damage was done so I looked at the clock, it was 9:30 and decided that I would go to bed too. I just wanted the day to end and start again on a fresh note.
My kids have expressed to me that I seem irritable and mad when I respond to them and that it doesn't matter what they say or do. I don't think that I am but maybe. I'm constantly catching them on their tone of voice. Micah has mentioned that I too have a tone in my voice at times and before he left for this week he reminded me of that and gently told me to watch how I talk to them and see how they respond. Well I guess I've blown it this week. I'm feeling really discouraged and frustrated and not sure what to do. I feel like everything I do or say is wrong with the kids. I have noticed that there are times I have been impatient with them and irritable but its only after they have kept asking or doing something or not understanding what I'm trying to say or do.
I have been tired lately, feeling pretty good but tired by the end of the day. It could be because I'm actually working out everyday and so by the end of the day I'm really tired. I don't know but all I do know is that there is a disconnection right now between the kids and I. I need God's help in my dealings with my children. So I laid in bed this morning and prayed to God for his help and guidance.
So now I will just wait. I have asked God to reveal to me the things that I need to change and do differently and begin again when the kids come home today from school. I have asked him to help me show grace in my responses with my children. I've have asked him to help me keep my mouth shut, my ears open and give me time to respond quietly when needed.
I'm happy and very thankful to God that Karlee, Kyle and Dillon went to youth group last night. I hope they continue. I'm looking forward to tonight, going to the woman's worship at church. I'm going to take the girls so that all the kids aren't left here at the house by themselves to avoid any conflict that could arise. Karlee loves to sing, maybe tonight our hearts will be touched and things will be revealed to us and we come together in our communicating with each other again.
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