Home

I've been home from the hospital the 2nd time around now for a week.  When I first left the hospital I was excited to be outside in the cold air, looking around, as if I'd been hidden away.  I know it's odd sounding but being in the hospital for 4 nights was like being in another world.  I was happy to go home, to my family, my own bed and pillow.

The first few days I was tired and staying in bed, but at least my own bed :)  By Saturday I was feeling a little stressed and overwhelmed with the things going on around me.  I soon learned real quickly about letting things go that I could not control and letting go of the worry and concern reminding myself who has it all under control.  Thank goodness God does.  But I my mid morning I found myself emotional and frustrated.  Micah was at work and I was home alone with the kids.  The boys were bored, one of them was talking a bunch of nonsense that drove me crazy and the other one wasn't listening and bothering his little sister.  I soon lost control and yelled and said things I shouldn't have said then I sat there and cried.  I cried like a baby, I couldn't help it, the tears rolled out.  I think I needed that release from everything that had been going on and settling back into to life at home.

Sunday I went to church and it was so wonderful to see my friends and be around my church family.  I enjoyed the music and the sermon but soon I found it hard and uncomfortable to sit there.  I asked Micah if we could leave.  By the time we hit the door for outside I was in tears and in so much pain.  I think it was a muscle spasm but it was intense.  I went home and took something and laid down and soon felt better.

It's been very helpful to have lovely ladies bring in a few meals this week.  Micah has continued to take good care of me.  Yesterday was nice, we just both rested and hung out around the house.  We also had enjoyed breakfast out together.

Today is Thursday and I find myself with more energy and less pain.  I ventured out to the store today.  It was nice to get out.  I'm tired and ready to relax now, but it was a good day and the weather was really nice too.

I continue to take each day at a time, and resting and going slow with life as each moment happens.  I await my doctor visit next week.  I'm really wanting to know what to expect and what will be next on this last go around with healing and all.  But until then I continue to give it all to God and hold on to him while all this is going on.  On a daily basis I let go of a little more and then a calm peaceful feeling is washed over me from head to toe and a smile is on my face.

Thank you Lord for your many blessings.