Reflection on the week

God's inspiration goes a long ways.....its like a light when its dark.......a happy break from when things aren't going well......a ray of hope that lasts longer than the not so good moment.

Looking back at the week has brought up some interesting little turns and things but in the end I'm still able to get through each day with the Lord beside me.

I don't remember much about Monday but on Tuesday evening we had a very sweet and dear family over for dinner, the former youth pastor.  I didn't realize how much I had missed being around his wife.  I love her insight and outlook on things.....it challenges me.  He has been visiting my step-son and doing a bible study with him.  It was great sharing what we each have seen going on with him.  His wife asked me how my health has been, she knows I have Fibromyaligia.  I told her that it was there and I just deal with it but now I think I can add something else to the list of things......but I will check it out more with my doctor appointment on the 8th.

Oh Tuesday after bible study until about Wed night I was super charged with God!  I was just consumed with energy to write out each thought that came to me.....to explore my bible and the verses that I had highlighted and notes written in the margin.  I think I have discovered my purpose.  It's all a mess right now on several pieces of paper and not quite together yet, a bunch of scattered thoughts.  I'm meeting with the one who helped start all of it for me, the speaker from Tuesday morning, our assistant pastor's wife some time soon.

But then......there was a turn for the next few days, not a very good one, a moody frustrated one.  This mood made me miserable for my family to be around.  There were moments that I wasn't proud of, I did ask for forgiveness from the Lord and the appropriate people.  Along with this moody I wasn't feeling good either and then on top of that it affected my body with having Fibro so I felt like a giant mess that just wanted to hide and never be seen or heard from again.

I found myself stuck in the mood and couldn't get out of it.  But I kept moving on day by day, soon it was the weekend.  My husband didn't really know it at the time but despite how I felt the night before and silently cried myself to sleep, that on Saturday he was going to help me with out even knowing it.  He and I went to eat breakfast and then to  Sams Club together and then later we went out shooting (I practice shooting my gun...not very good)

Just by getting out and doing something really helped me.  Being outdoors and with him was the best thing I needed to help get me out of the mood.  Today on our way home from church I shared that with him and told him thank you.  I don't think he quite understood but he smiled anyways and said okay.

Today is Sunday and its been a good day, sunny and bright.  We enjoyed church and the BBQ afterwards.  But then we get home and my ex-husband came by to pick up Sara and we had a conversation that left me with a tight neck and shoulders and instant body aches and everything else that goes with the wonderful thing of having Fibromyligia.  It got worse as time went on and I shared it Micah and he said to drop it, nothing I could do about it.  It ate at me and it bothered me so much that it did that!

Shortly after I decided to walk the dogs, soon the cool breeze floated across me, the air smelled like rain, I really was starting to relax.  Its evening now and I'm feeling better.  Today has been a good day, not too tired or moody :)

Thank you God for making the most out of each moment no matter how I might be feeling.