Diving In (Session 1)

The speaker over the weekend talked about "Diving In".  Diving in to gain a closer relationship with God.  One of the sessions was called "Diving In -To Conquer Fear and Move Forward"  She used Esther as the example.  I look back at my notes and realize that I can look at my life through Esther and use it in the middle of my storm right now.  There are times I feel like my past comes up and that I'm defined by it.  I know that I'm not because God has changed my heart.  God has placed me in a blended family and I have come to realize that I can not control it.  In this process over the last two years of struggles I have gained a deeper relationship with Him than I had two or four years ago.  My relationship continues to grow everyday as I try to fall into His word on a daily basis, as I surround myself with people that are walking on the path with the Lord.  He has broken me down to be humble and teachable.  There are times I feel like I'm playing the role of Esther in my family.  Its amazing that with all she went through, she accomplished so much.....all because she softened her heart to Jesus and listened and followed his ways and not her own. He continues to show me that I'm not in control, He is and that I need to trust him.  Its a daily dying to self to keep trusting in Him.  I want to be used for the good of the Lord, I want Him to show me how I can help and serve in my blended family and my marriage.  I want to move forward with God next to me every step of the way.