Embracing Easter in the Chilly Serenity of Flagstaff, AZ

Today is Easter in Flagstaff, Arizona. Even though it's snowy outside, I decided to attend the church service online. I'm grateful for this special day and happy to witness the sun shining through the clouds.

As I wait for Sara to arrive, I'm reflecting on the difficult week I've had. I've faced personal challenges and then with my mom's online hacking of her account and her worry and concern for my grandmother is in hospice care, and my mom's back pain and lack of sleep. Despite the distance between us, I found comfort in talking to my mom and supporting her from a distance.

I'm excited about my daughter's upcoming wedding, but it's also a busy time with work and preparations. I'm trying to stay present and enjoy each moment.

Writing this, I feel peaceful and grateful for life's simple moments. I'm reminded to take things slowly and enjoy the journey, regardless of its ups and downs.

As Easter continues, I'm reminded of our resilience and our ability to find warmth and comfort even in difficult times. I'm grateful for the memories I'm making and the love I have in my life.

Surviving a Chaotic Week

Reflections and Lessons Learned

Have you ever experienced a week that seems to stretch on endlessly, with every day feeling like a test of your patience and resilience? I can definitely relate. Let me share with you my tumultuous week and the insights I've gained along the way.

It all started on Monday, and right from the beginning, I had a feeling this week was going to be tough. By Wednesday, I was already counting down the minutes until the weekend. Work was like a battlefield, with drama swirling around like a tornado. It was exhausting, both mentally and emotionally. And just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, I lost my phone. I had to retrace my steps and try to find it.

But wait, there's more. Fast forward to this morning, and guess what? I managed to leave my purse at home. Can you believe it? It was just adding insult to injury. I seriously contemplated just declaring it a work-from-home day. The universe seemed to be testing my limits, and quite frankly, I was teetering on the edge.

To top it off, the weather decided to join in on the chaos, with the wind blowing like a hurricane outside. It was the cherry on top of a week that seemed determined to knock me down at every turn. But amidst the chaos and frustration, I realized something important – resilience is not just about bouncing back from adversity; it's also about finding the strength to keep going when everything feels like it's falling apart.

Instead of giving up, I decided to take control of the situation. I left work early to tackle the task of getting a new phone, even though the timing couldn't have been worse. Sure, it's going to mean a higher phone bill and a bit of inconvenience, but in the grand scheme of things, it's just a bump in the road.

As I reflect on this whirlwind of a week, I'm reminded of the importance of perspective. Yes, things may not have gone according to plan, and yes, it's been a tough few days. But amid chaos, there are always moments of clarity and growth. Each challenge we face is an opportunity to learn and evolve, to become stronger and more resilient versions of ourselves.

Emotional Shift to Closure

 It’s fascinating how just several months ago, seeing Ben would stir up sadness or tears, likely because the breakup was still fresh and I missed our connection, or perhaps because his presence provided a sense of companionship. However, yesterday, while retrieving more of my belongings from his house and driving back into town, I noticed a significant shift. I didn’t feel sad at all; in fact, I didn’t feel much of anything. I was surprisingly okay. I simply resumed my day without being weighed down by emotions. Even while at his place, surrounded by memories, none of it seems to affect me. It’s as if I’ve reach a point of acceptance or closure. I feel like I have reached closure and ready for whatever will unfold next, until then I will keep moving forward and making the most out of small moments, lots of joy and big blessings that find me each new day.

Embracing Happiness:

Reflections on Single Life

Today, I had the pleasure of listening to Stacy share a glimpse into her life as a single woman at the age of 58. It was refreshing to hear her speak with such contentment and joy about her journey, having been single for the past decade.

Stacy's story served as a reminder that happiness is not contingent on relationship status. Despite society often placing emphasis on finding a partner, Stacy proves that being single can be fulfilling and rewarding in its own right.

Now, I'm not saying that I've decided to follow Stacy's path and remain single for years to come. My journey may take a different course, and that's perfectly okay. But hearing Stacy's perspective offered valuable insight into the diversity of human experience.

What I do know for certain is that I want to prioritize my happiness, regardless of whether I'm single or in a relationship. While I may not envision spending my life alone, I recognize the importance of finding fulfillment within myself, independent of anyone else.

Stacy's story reminds us that happiness is a choice, and it's within our power to cultivate it in every aspect of our lives, whether we're single or coupled. So here's to embracing happiness, whatever form it may take, and living life with joy and purpose every step of the way.

Finding Pease in the Midst of Chaos

My Weekend Reflection

This past weekend was a rollercoaster of emotions for me. On Saturday, I found solace in decluttering my space. It was a simple task but immensely satisfying. As I sorted through my belongings, I couldn't help but feel a sense of liberation with every item I chose to donate. Creating physical space in my closet mirrored the mental space I craved.

Yet, amidst the satisfaction, a nagging worry lingered in the back of my mind. Financial concerns loomed over me, as I grappled with the reality of stretching a tight budget over the next two weeks. Despite this, I sought comfort in journaling and leaning into my faith, trusting that God would provide.

Sunday arrived with a heavy weight on my shoulders. Stress and overwhelm threatened to engulf me. Despite my efforts to manage my thoughts through journaling, it wasn't enough. A meltdown ensued, but it was in the presence of a dear friend, Christina, that I found solace. Her unwavering support reminded me of the power of community in navigating life's challenges.

Fatigue permeated through me on Monday, a result of emotional exhaustion from the events of the weekend. However, a candid conversation with Christina and her husband over lunch provided the emotional release I desperately needed. It was a moment of vulnerability that ultimately left me feeling lighter.

Acknowledging my tiredness, I allowed myself to rest. Taking a brief nap on the couch proved to be a much-needed reprieve, rejuvenating me for the tasks ahead.

Reflecting on the highs and lows of the weekend, I am reminded of the importance of self-care and leaning on those around us for support. Life may throw curveballs, but it is through connection and faith that we find resilience.

As I navigate the days ahead, I hold onto the lessons learned from this weekend – the power of decluttering, the strength found in community, and the necessity of self-compassion. Each moment, whether triumphant or challenging, is an opportunity for growth and grace.

Just Do It

Moving Forward with Faith and Courage

In life, when faced with challenges and obstacles, it's easy to feel overwhelmed, stuck, and even defeated. But amidst the struggles, there's a powerful truth that we often forget: we have the strength within us to overcome, and with faith and courage, we can move forward.

Support, courage, energy, determination—these are all vital components on our journey through life. But perhaps the most crucial element of all is our connection to something greater than ourselves. For many, that source of strength and guidance is found in God.

Following Jesus isn't just about waiting for divine intervention. It's about taking action, standing up, and walking forward with confidence that He will lead the way. We can't sit idly by, waiting for God to fix everything for us. Instead, we must take the initiative, knowing that He will be there to support us every step of the way.

It's easy to get caught up in negative thoughts and feelings, blaming others for our circumstances. But true growth and healing come from taking responsibility for our own lives and embracing the risk of starting something new. With each step forward, we gain strength and confidence, knowing that we are not alone.

Just like the iconic Nike commercial says, "Just Do It." Stop making excuses, stop procrastinating, and take that leap of faith. Whether it's pursuing a new career path, repairing a broken relationship, or overcoming past hurts, the first step is always the hardest—but it's also the most important.

For me, that step forward came in the form of returning to church after years of staying away due to being hurt. I thought I could find solace in my own devotional time at home, but it wasn't enough. It took the encouragement of a friend to push me out of my comfort zone and try out a new church. And you know what? It was exactly what I needed.

Three visits later, I found myself immersed in worship, surrounded by a community of believers, and listening to the word of God spoken through a pastor. It was a reminder that sometimes, the best way to move on from something that hurt us is to face it head-on and just do it.

So, whatever it is that's holding you back, whatever fear or doubt is keeping you stuck—let go of the excuses, take a deep breath, and take that first step forward. Trust in God's guidance, and know that with each step, you are moving closer to a brighter, more fulfilling future. Just do it.

Embracing Change: Finding Joy in Starting Over at 50

 Finding Joy in Starting Over at 50

As I sit here reflecting on the past year, it's hard to believe that it's only been almost a year since I moved into my current home. Despite the relatively short time, it feels like I've been here much longer. My space has become a reflection of who I am, and I've grown to love it dearly. It's my sanctuary, a place that exudes relaxation, coziness, and warmth, welcoming me every time I walk through the door.

But it wasn't always like this. Just a few months ago, I was grappling with the devastation of ending a six-year relationship with Ben. The thought of moving on seemed impossible; I was stuck in a state of shock and didn't want to let go. All I craved was the comfort and security that Ben provided. Starting over at 50 felt daunting, like embarking on a journey with no clear destination in sight.

Yet, here I am now, feeling happier than I have in a long time. The heaviness of emotion that once burdened me has lifted, and the gloomy cloud that hung over my head has dissipated. I no longer feel consumed by sadness or weighed down by the weight of what could have been. Instead, I feel okay—truly okay.

This past year has marked the beginning of a new chapter in the book of my life. It's a chapter filled with self-discovery, growth, and resilience. I've learned that starting over doesn't mean erasing the past; rather, it's about embracing the opportunity for a fresh start, a chance to rewrite the narrative and create a life that brings me joy and fulfillment.

Sure, there have been challenges along the way, moments of doubt and uncertainty. But through it all, I've found strength in knowing that I am capable of navigating this new chapter with grace and courage. And as I continue on this journey of self-renewal, I am filled with hope and excitement for what the future holds.

So here's to embracing change, to finding joy in new beginnings, and to writing the next chapter of my life with intention and purpose. After all, the best stories are often those that begin with a leap of faith and a willingness to embrace the unknown.

Moving Beyond Hurt

A Journey of Healing and Redemption

In life, we often encounter moments of deep hurt and disappointment, especially within the context of our faith communities. For many of us, being wounded by the very institution meant to provide solace and support can be profoundly disheartening. However, there comes a point where we must confront our pain and make a choice: to remain stagnant in our suffering or to embark on a journey of healing and redemption.

I confess that for a long time, I chose the former. It was easier to wallow in my hurt, to blame others for my wounds, and to use past grievances as excuses for my lack of progress. I found comfort in playing the role of the victim, believing it absolved me of responsibility. Yet, deep down, I knew this was not the path to true healing and reconciliation.

The turning point came when I realized that by refusing to confront my pain, I was also distancing myself from my relationship with God. I felt like I had disappointed my heavenly Father, that I had let Him down by allowing bitterness and resentment to consume me. Instead of seeking His forgiveness and surrendering to His love, I withdrew further into my own self-imposed exile.

But God, in His infinite grace, never gave up on me. He gently nudged me to acknowledge my role in perpetuating my own suffering, to stop blaming others, and to take responsibility for my own healing. It was a daunting task, requiring humility, vulnerability, and a willingness to let go of my pride.

Slowly but surely, I began to release the grip of resentment and anger that had held me captive for so long. I reached out to God, not in defiance or half-heartedness, but with genuine surrender and trust. I allowed Him to lead me through the dark corridors of my past, guiding me towards a place of forgiveness and redemption.

It wasn't easy, and there were moments when I faltered and stumbled. But with each step forward, I felt God's presence growing stronger within me, filling the empty spaces where pain had once resided. I realized that my past experiences, painful as they were, had not been in vain. They had shaped me, molded me into someone with the capacity to empathize, to understand the depths of human suffering, and to offer hope to those in need.

Today, I stand before you not as a victim of my past, but as a testament to the power of God's love to heal and transform. I no longer shy away from sharing my story, knowing that it may resonate with others who have walked similar paths. My greatest desire is to be a beacon of hope, to extend a hand to those who are still lost in their pain, and to point them towards the light of God's love.

So if you find yourself trapped in a cycle of hurt and bitterness, I urge you to take that first step towards healing. It may be scary, and it may require you to confront some uncomfortable truths, but I promise you, it is worth it. God is waiting with open arms, ready to embrace you and guide you towards a future filled with hope and redemption. Trust in Him, surrender to His love, and allow Him to lead you out of the darkness and into the light.

A Weekend of Refreshing Retreat

 Finding Solace in Family and Tranquility

This past weekend, I embarked on a journey to Eager, Arizona, to spend time with my mom. After a bustling weekend in Phoenix with my kids and their friends the week prior, I returned home feeling pleasantly exhausted but invigorated by the memories made. However, this weekend held a different energy - one of tranquility and rejuvenation.

Arriving at my mom's home, I immediately felt a sense of calm wash over me. The wind howled outside, but within the walls of her cozy abode, there was a serene stillness that embraced us. We decided to take it easy and indulge in simple pleasures.

Together, my mom and I delved into old memories, sifting through cherished belongings and reminiscing about times gone by. We also ventured out to explore quaint local shops filled with unique gifts and antiques, immersing ourselves in the charm of small-town treasures.

In the company of my mom and step-dad, we shared laughter and stories over drinks and dinner, cherishing each moment of togetherness. One evening, my mom and I embarked on our own version of a wine and paint night, letting our creativity flow freely onto canvases as we bonded over shared passions.

But amidst the leisurely activities, there was a deeper purpose to my visit. My mom has been grappling with the emotional strain of having to put my grandmother in hospice care, and I knew that my presence would bring her comfort during this challenging time.

Spending these precious moments with my mom was not only a gift to her but also a gift to myself. Despite a busy week awaiting me upon my return, the opportunity to connect with family and offer support proved to be invaluable.

As I reflect on this weekend retreat, I am reminded of the healing power of love, laughter, and quality time spent with loved ones. Sometimes, amidst life's chaos, all we need is a moment of respite in the embrace of family to restore our spirits and nourish our souls.